Note to God(s) or lack there of.

one of the DND games i play is "Us the Campaign" where we made ourselves and play through odd happenings in Minneapolis. Well our game had its first player death. Me. I ended up in a white waiting room where a secretary asked me to fill out some forms. In my dazed confusion of there being an after life, i started to fill them out. about half way through i remember who i really am. Someone who believe in any and all possibilities, and, to be blunt, a dick to people who tell me what to do. So instead of continuing to fill them out, i decided to write a note on the front page of the documents. Here are the 3 revisions i did, the 3rd is what i went with.


I have reviewed this document to its fullest and attest that to the best of my recollection and interpretation of how reality unfolds, this is accurate, but due to the fallacies of my own mind i cannot guarantee my mind has worked according to proper specifications or has been tampered with by forces beyond my own mental fortitude.


Due to the fallacies of my own mind this documentation is irrelevant because of the possibility that i might not recollect properly and other forces beyond my own mental fortitude may have, probably have, obviously have (due to the event that will be known here on as a 'flash back') altered my comprehension ability to remember.


Due to the fallacies of my own mind i cannot continue to fill out this documentation. There is to great of the possibility that my ability to recollect and/or interpret how reality unfolds might be flawed. There is also the feasibility that other forces beyond my own mental fortitude may have, probably have, obviously have (due to the event that will be known here on as a 'flash back') altered my comprehension and hindsight.

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Power Outage

It was late in the night, though one would have not known it by looking with all the light that flooded my room. I sat and did what one from my generation does best, bingeing on multitasking through the cyberverse, when suddenly it seemed i died. There was no more soft heavenly 60 watt glow from above, no pixilated lights shinning brightly in my face, or even tens of LED's giving my room the softly nightly glow that allows me just enough to navigate through dumping ground of my floor. There was no hum from the refrigerator, no whirling of a half dozen fans from within my computer and around my room, no spinning of harddrive or humming of electricity shooting through probably a miles worth of cables gathered in a mess around the parameter of my room. Only pitch black, the ringing of silence I have become so unaccustomed to, and one other thing, the only thing to suggest life in this new found void I found myself in. A soft but determined, tick…tick…tick…tick. The battery operated quartz clock on my wall, the only thing left still pushing along in my room.

It was evident, the power had gone out. I reach behind me to a shelf, unfamiliar to my mind due to lack of use, and fumbled a bit to find my trust Mag-Lite (™) flashlight. The small button clicked under my thumb and light up the desolate room. A eerie feeling washed over me, what I might imagine one might feel looking at ancient ruins for the first time. Surely these were not ancient, despite the rapid aging of electronics, but the room had the same dead feel, at least to me.

I sat and I wondered what to do. Like a fool, I thought to myself, I had not charged my laptop, or my iPad, or even my cellphone. This room was essentially dead. I sat there like a lost child, unsure of what to do. Everything that I depended on for entertainment was now gone from me. Even my own body started to follow in suit. With out all the artificial light and entertainment, my mind was quickly realizing that it was night and remembering that night is a time for sleep. But I would not give in so easily to this "folly of nature". I decided to explore such a strange new world that was forced upon me by… whatever means they were initiated.

Putting shoes on I ventured out of my desolate room and into the streets of suburbia. It was an odd sensation looking at this new world in it's cadaverous state. The unusually wooded area of Minnetonka does a lot to filter out sound and light which only enhanced the unusual state it was in. I ventured through the streets and saw more evidence of the now electricly devoid city. There were no superfluous lights shinning on trees, or lighting up unused pathways. Windows were left black and empty of the late night television glow, or lights left on as a charlatan's sense of security. A careful listener as I was, I could not even hear the humming of hundreds of air conditioners during this sweltering night. Yet, as I wandered the streets and looked around, it was not an inert darkness, but a proper darkness. Dispite my thriving need and addiction to technology, there was a part of me that knew this was right, how things should be. I began to enjoy the quiet and darkness that emcompassed me, for though my old life was isolated, I now felt solitude. Most might find it distrubing but from my background, I appreciate the annonimity of it all.

All things must end though and soon I headed back to the remnants of my home for rest. As I approched, the breath of life breezed across the neighborhood. Motion sensor lights quickly turn on in a manner akin to a sleeping student suddenly being called on for an answer. Lights, having been turned on so the occupants might awake when the power came back, now flooded out from houses. I stopped and I looked into my room from the outside. There were all those precious LED's, the flashing pixels, the humming fans, that falsity of day and life. I looked back to the buzzing streets, now lit. I gave a soft disapointed sigh as I entered my room. I ran through the vexatious task of resetting alarm clocks and making sure my desktop computer was still working. Then, I paused. I sat down and took account of the event that had transpired. With this now done, I think I'll let my room rest once more, and I with it.
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Accidental Munchkin

Accidental Munchkin

Panel 1 - INT - Front shot, DM (Early-Mid Twenties, overweight, glasses) hunched over a desk, hands in hair distressed. RPG style books in front of him, some dice strewn across the desk and some pages of notes.

DM
Crap, game night is tomorrow and
I still don't have a villain yet.
What am I going to do?

Panel 2 - Close up of DM's eyes, wide open with surprise looking down at desk

DM
Whoa! Thats an awesome ability!

Panel 3 - DM scratching his head flipping through some pages.

DM
I thought I saw something earlier that'd
work really well with that... but
where was it?

Panel 4 - Behind DM, digital clock above him shows time as 9:34 PM.

DM
Oh hey! That'd work well with it
too...

Panel 5 - Digital clock above him shows time as 10:28 PM.

DM
Oh and this... and this...

Panel 6 - Digital clock above him shows time as 1:06 AM.

DM
Holy crap this one's awesome!

Panel 7 - Digital clock above him shows time as 3:12 AM.

DM
Finished! This villain is going to
challenge them for sure!

Panel 8 - white text on black background

TEXT
THE NEXT DAY...

Panel 9 - EXT - Dense Forest background, trees broken, areas burnt to crisp, blood splatter everywhere, a Giant lying dead with huge gapping cut through its stomach

Panel 10 - Heavily armored Knight with head chopped off lying next to body which is slumped against a tree.

Panel 11 - A bloody pile of robes with a wizard hat laying on top of it and a tome next to it

Panel 12 - Weretiger Man looking horrified at his bloody claws. The 3 bodies laying behind him in the background.

WERETIGER MAN
Dear gods... what have I done!

Panel 13 - INT - Large table with 4 people sitting around it, one of the people is DM. DM sits behind a GM screen looking horrified like the Weretiger Man.

PLAYER 1
Dude you're a total munchkin!

PLAYER 2
What were you thinking throwing
us up against that guy?

PLAYER 3
And it was the first enemy too!

Panel 14 - Closer down to the table looking across it to DM, the three players on the peripheral of the frame

DM
I... I didn't mean to! I swear!

Panel 15 - Wide Shot, Players exiting the room, DM sits there depressed.

PLAYER 1
That was so lame.

PLAYER 2
Way to over-powered.

PLAYER 3
I never got to use my wood
carving skill...

Panel 16 - Close up of DM sad and depressed, single tear rolling down his cheek.

DM
I just tried to make it challenging...

END

Explanation - Something incredibly similar to this happened in a game I ran. Thankfully the ending wasn't as dramatic. I decided to fudge the rules to get a happier ending then what this DM got. But it's a problem I feel I run into too often. It's not that I try to make villains over powered, I just know the rules and spend, literally, hours making characters, trying to find the best way to get what I want out of it. Munchkining is, in my opinion, when a player tries to find every rule and every loophole, that they can find in order to make theit character the most unstoppable killing machine the game has ever seen. The problem is that I accidentally munchkin. I usually don't take advantage of loop holes but I do spend a great deal of time looking up rules, because making a character is a lot of fun for me, so I do it well. I also do try to keep at least one gapping flaw in enemies for players to take advantage of, even if that gapping flaw is slightly hidden... Oh well.
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Misspelled

"What the hell, Karen?!"
Karen snickered behind her hands. "I... I didn't know this would happen, I swear!"
"Well fix it!"
"I don't know how, James. It’s a miracle I pulled it off in the first place. This isn't something I do on a normal basis you know."
"That’s exactly why I was worried about you casting that spell in the first place!"
"Well we need to find that guy who stole our amulet, or we're never going to get back home. So are you going to be a good boy, or do I need to try and find a new spell to cast?" Karen started to flip through the thick ragged pages of the worn leather tome.
James groaned, but he couldn't think of any other way. Neither of them knew how to track someone through the woods, or through anywhere else for that matter.
"Well... how do I...?"
"I'd imagine it’s exactly how you've seen it happen. The dog walks around sniffing the ground."
"But don't I need something from the guy to sniff first?"
"Wait... I think I remember seeing..." Karen started to look on the dense forest floor. A light brown handkerchief lay over some bushes. She picked it up and looked back to James. "He dropped this when he was wrestling with you for the amulet. Sniff it."
"Isn't that a handkerchief?"
"Yeah so?"
"So he's probably wiped off sweat with that, and blown his nose in there, and-and... god knows what else!"
"Do you want to stay in this... whereever this is, forever?"
"Of course not."
"Well this is our only lead back home. So stop being a bad dog and sniff the handkerchief already."
"Only if you stop with the good boy, bad dog stuff."
"Fine." Karen smirked a little and held out the handkerchief. James walked over still getting used to the fact that he now had four legs. He leaned in and sniffed the handkerchief hesitantly. It was amazing how vivid the smells were. Sure the smells were strong before but suddenly he could distinguish this smell from the thousands of others flooding his nose.
"It so weird. Its like having high-def for your nose! Everything’s so crisp and distinct!"
"Good boy." Karen smirked.
James growled a little bit at her, annoyed by her taunts.
"Oh quiet and hurry up before the scent fades or something."
James sighed a little and started to sniff around. The strong sweaty stench of the man was all over the area.
"He was defiantly here."
"Well I could have told you that you dolt. Start heading where he went and follow his scent."
"Right, right." James started off where their mysterious mugger ran off, sniffing along the way. Karen followed close behind.
Her eyes looking over the spell page she had used not more then an hour ago in the comfort of her own bedroom. Now she was in the middle of some dense forest. She didn't know exactly how they had gotten here, the spell book was suppose to have been a joke, a fun way to past the night. But then the amulet had glowed and, with a feeling of being pulled through cold syrup, they had found themselves here. It was clear that if they ever wanted to get back, they had to find the amulet again. 0 comments

A googled poem on Death

Just to be sure i'm clear, this do not actually represent my current state of mind. This googled poems are just random bits and pieces pulled from a google search and strung together somewhat coherently.


Death
Termination of the biological functions,
friendly reminder that life is slipping away.
It is clear enough,
the possible life span.
Throughout the world,
we will die.
Free streaming,
by this name.
Near death experiances,
Trying to escape.
It might give us,
causes and symptoms.
But what am i,
feeling overwhelmed with grief.
Trends, attitudes, philosophical beliefs,
saddened the whole.
Explore the many,
feel uneasy.
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A Googled Poem

I google searched 2 words from the top of my head. I went down and took bits and pieces out of each link from 2 pages of search results. I strung them together in order and compiled the following 2 poems.


Randomness

There is no intelligible pattern

to anyone on the internet.

For something slightly less,

Archive.

My Mind Goes,

And Discusses why,

In Under a minute,

perceived and disguised.

The essential companion,

a sequence of numbers or symbols.

The hidden role of Chance,

Introduces the concept of chance.

Why this is important,

EVERYONE IS ASKING.

Having no specific pattern, purpose or objective,

Feed your mind.

Why it's hard (and interesting),

that is thrown in together.


Love

Affection and attachment,

Calculates the chance.

Generates a blissful feeling,

ect.

Make sure it runs,

together with the spirit.

When you wanna say something,

towards a person.

romance and relationships,

It's all going off.

It begins,

I'm glad.

Love revisited,

Love really.

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Carla's Dive

The sound of wind ripping past Carla's ears barely managed to drown out the sounds of the planet bellow. She didn't want to hear it anymore. The people were so noisy. Always yelling, screaming, swearing. It didn't matter how far she went either, she could hear it all. Every last corner of the miserable planet echoed in her ears. Even with the wind fuzzing everything out, they were still there, barely audible, but still there. The air screamed as she suddenly changed direction and the ocean exploded as she plunged in.

Carla stopped and braced as the ocean came crashing down atop her filling itself back in. Everything became dark, and gradually the ocean became quite around her. The ocean whooshed gently across her body. She wasn't sure how deep she was, but she had never felt such intense pressure around her. It was nice though, having a limit. Everything had always been hers for the taking whether she wanted it or not, but down here she had to work a little just to move.

Her lungs started to burn softly for oxygen. She didn't want to leave though. No one was talking down here, she wasn't accidentally looking through buildings or sneezing trucks away. Carla began to feel light headed, but she wanted to stay here a bit longer. Stay where no one was demanding she help or trying - however futile - to hurt her.

She wasn't invincible though. She launched herself up. The ocean desperately tried to hold onto her as she opened it up behind her. With a loud crash Carla broke free of the ocean's grasp. Her ears quickly filled with voices again... something about a tsunami. Carla froze for a second and looked down at the ocean, still healing from her exit. She sighed softly, if she didn't stop it now the cries of anguish and hate would just grow louder. Next time she would have to dive a bit more carefully.
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